Planet of the Umps: A Baseball Life from Behind the Plate

 

Planet of the Umps: A Baseball Life from Behind the Plate – Ken Kaiser

Ken Kaiser was one of the more colorful umpires in the American League during the 1970s – 1990s.  In fact, most umpires tend to glide under the radar.  Even the most arduous fans of the game don’t necessarily know a lot about the men in black calling the game.  Usually whenever an umpire ends up in the spotlight, it’s because of a major error he made.  In other words, the better the umpire, the more anonymous they are. 

I guess Kaiser was the exception. Like all umpires, he wasn’t perfect, but he had a bit of a colorful reputation since he was somewhat bigger than life – both literally and figuratively.  He wasn’t a huge man, but he’s a former professional wrestler.  This really isn’t a book so much about the man, however. This is more of a book about the profession.  And in this it succeeds.  Reading about the adventures of a major league umpire is rewarding since it gives us a peek behind the curtains as to what can happen where players, coaches, and even fans are concerned.

Kaiser hits all the highlights.  He talks a bit about his minor league career, his progression to the majors (not an easy thing, too many candidates and too few jobs), the good guys and the bad guys on the field, the unions, the rabid fans, and the highs and lows of the occupation.   Sometimes when writing, Kaiser tries a tad too hard to be funny, and it slightly takes away from the narrative. Yes, this is supposed to be a fun book, but there are times when he can overdo it a bit.

He raises some good points that most of us don’t ever think about when viewing a game.  Example: Notice that for the entire game, an umpire can never sit down. I imagine that’s mightily uncomfortable, but I honestly never considered that before.  He also points out that in the 4-man umpire rotation, the worst gig is behind home plate.  The best, though, is the 3^rd base assignment.  Think about the last game that you saw. Just how involved does the 3^rd Base umpire have to be?

Eventually, the unions and the bargaining ended his career, and it really is sad. Kaiser makes a pretty good argument that the umpires (like the players) were badly mistreated and abused; especially in the money department.  But when the union tried to do a bit too much, many were sacked.

This is overall a nice, light-hearted account.  My guess is every umpire could write such a reflection, and most fans would love to read these accounts.  It’s fun to learn more than what we’re supposed to know; about the game, the players, and the entire major league environment.  A nice little fun read.